What the Knitting SWAT team would see...

Control Centre: Knitting Surveillance, can you call in with your location and target please copy over.

KS: CC, currently outside target's home... she's been knitting, but has just taken a delivery...over

CC: Delivery? Can we get a zoom in on that? Is it contraband? Over.

KS: Nope, French knitting magazines... Phildar, I think. Yes, confirmation, five Phildar mags, over.

KS: Update, CC, update! Target has changed location. She remains at home, but is now on the couch, nursing a cup of tea and sighing contentedly whilst flicking through magazines.

Control Centre: Come on in to office, Knitting Surveillance... that target won't be going anywhere this afternoon. You guys may as well take a load off. Over and out.

Green Polly

Fresh off the needles is the first outfit completed for the "Handmade For Grumbles" campaign: a super cute green cotton cardigan for summer, which she is wearing with her Three Way Dress. Yes, yes, I know - it's still freezing cold here, but at my current pace I need to get started early if the poor kid is going to be clothed this summer!
It was quite a quick knit - in fact, it would have been even quicker if I hadn't let the pieces sit around for a couple of weeks whilst I regarded them with a grumpy look and a sore back and decided I would sew them tomorrow, honestly, I'll do it tomorrow, but once I sat down the sewing was done relatively soon. Even picking up all the stitches for the neckband was pretty easy, and that's a job I usually detest.

I didn't bother blocking the pieces in the usual fashion, which is to wet the knitted pieces, carefully pin them to a blocking board, and then leave for at least 24 hours for the pieces to dry. Instead I used a sneaky trick of my own devising, which is to put a wet tea towel over the knitted piece which has been placed on the ironing board, and then iron the billy-oh out of it. I'm sure Elizabeth Zimmerman is rolling in her grave right now, but the technique works for me. And, yes, I'll confess: I do this on all my finished knitted pieces, bad bad me. You're reading the writing of the last of the knitting rebels, folks!

Project Details
Pattern: Polly from Rowan Kids
Yarn: 3 balls of Jo Sharp Soho Summer DK Cotton
Needles: 4mm and 3mm (I used a size down to get gauge)
Button: Shell button from Tessuti Fabrics

Details on Ravely here.

Craft Spring Cleaning

I'm not sure if it's the extra sunshine in the air, or fact that I have my usual amount of mobility back, but I have been taken by the sudden, not-to-be-ignored urge to do some craft spring cleaning. I look around our tiny home, and shudder at the wips and ufos that are lying about, adding nothing but an air of clutter and an atmosphere of crafting guilt at their unfinished states to our home. I feel like they are dragging me down, down, down to the very depths of a rut of incompleteness. And that, to quote Mary Poppins, will never do!

So this morning has been spent finding all these projects, and deciding what to do with them. The above was formerly the back of the lovely Cherry by Anna Bell, which for some reason that I seriously cannot fathom now was lying in a box under the bed with it's needles pulled out. Taking it out and shaking off the dust, I tried to read my knitting notes (I take copious notes when knitting - does anybody else?) but found them to be as unilluminating to my mind as hieroglyphics. What the heck was I jotting down? Unable to interpret myself, I frogged with a grim face, and decided that this project could be tackled at a later date, once other things had been completed and the weather was more suitable to wearing a cute summery cardigan.

I will admit to a slight twinge of sadness as I frogged - I remembered so very clearly beginning the cardigan as I sat next to Grumbles on the front stoop of our old home, I basking in the sunshine as I cast on and wrangled with my cable needle, Grumbles besides me slurping away on a succession of home made frozen yoghurt icy-poles, watching our hunky, usually shirtless neighbour berating his girlfriend at the top of his voice - even, at times, chasing her down the street as she sped off in his car - before turning to us, giving a friendly wave and saying "Hey duuuudes, how ya doin?" Apart from the whole yelling-at-his-girlfriend thing (and to totally honest, she ignored him completely, so she didn't seem to bothered by it all) he was a pretty friendly guy. I miss those days!

Oh, and don't fear, fellow knitters, about the frogging - to be honest, my tension was spectacularly crap, as I hadn't really gotten the hang of knitting with cotton at that stage, so it truly is all for the best! That's what happens why you focus more on the sunshine, Grumble's company and the street's spectacles than knitting with cotton. Lesson learned.

Back to spring cleaning: My other Yoga Wrap, which travelled around Europe with us, only to be worked on for a couple of rows at the very most before I realised that knitting on trains gives me motion sickness has been pulled out, with a pledge to finish it before the cool weather disappears. Likewise the coat and dress I have cut out and sitting on top of the buffet that houses all of my sewing gear - these too have been moved up the sewing queue.

And yesterday I finished the summer cardigan I have been working on for Grumbles (pics soon, promise!) so really, things are moving along at a cracking speed. And that, my friends, feels gooooooood!

If only I had such a can-do attitude to spring cleaning the dust bunnies under the bed...

Reappearance

Ack! It has not been exactly a barrel of laughs chez Jorth of late. Firstly I got a sore back - which, I can assure you, wasn't enhanced by falling down our stairs a few days later - and so have been seeing a chiro for the last few weeks. She's doing a fabulous job, but oh my goodness my poor stubborn muscles are not liking being forced back into their original configurations, much preferring their lazy, hunching positions thanks very much. I can almost hear them muttering to themselves: "Why let Jorthy stand up nice and straight when she's the one who has made us hunch over a computer/sewing machine/knitting needles for all these years? The crafty old sod deserves all the pain we can give her!" So it's constant hobbling and wincing from me at the moment, hence the lack of, oh gee, any projects whatsoever. Seriously - some mornings sitting down to eat breakfast has been an ordeal, so crafting has been totally out of the question. Sigh.

However I had pretty much reread the entire Bill Bryson oeuvre for want of anything else to do, so not all is lost.

Poor Galumph, meanwhile, did something nasty to his neck on Friday, so he's been flat on his back for the last five days, only raising himself up with moans and groans to see the osteopath, who makes him moan and groan some more. It's been so pathetic around here (truly, there is no other word!) that Grumbles has taken to wringing her hands and declaring to the world at large that "My family is falling apart on me!"
Still, I do feel somewhat better (and more mobile!) today, so I have cut out a new project. Huzzah! Is this, perchance, a sign that life may life soon be returning to normal? I BLOODY WELL HOPE SO!

And the winner of the Liberty Jersey giveaway is...

...according, of course, to the good folk at Random.org...Fer! Well done Fer, and thanks to everybody for entering the comp. Sniff, sniff - it was so sweet to get so many lovely birthday and blog wishes. Thanks guys!

Making our own

Grumbles, bless her heart, has decided that this summer she wants me to make all of her clothes for her. In fact, the cheeky monkey has insisted, and has even decreed that she wants to take the Hand Made Pledge (cos hand made is better, Mum!)

Since I took the Hand Made Pledge myself at the beginning of the year, and (apart from one purchase) have made my entire wardrobe this year, who was I to argue? Anything that stops suppporting the ghastly treatment of downtrodden textiles workers is fine by me.

So, even though the Melbourne has been grey and drab and frankly freeeeezing this week, I have begun to get a start on her summer wardrobe. I've had to - she had already outgrown lasts years shorts...last summer. It was all getting a bit too Kylie-in-gold-hotpants-looking, or in other words the kid desperately needs summer clothes pronto! Presenting yet another Three Way Dress from Ottobre Design Magazine 3/2009:



And one last reminder: If you haven't already entered, don't forget about the Liberty Jersey birthday giveaway. Hoorah!

The Liberty Dress

What's a girl to do when it's raining, it's pouring, the light is fading rapidly but she has a brand new Liberty jersey print dress to show off?

Get out and take a pic anyway, using her daughter's totally sophisticated bird umbrella as a prop!

Totally, totally loving this dress. The Liberty was an absolute dream to work with. It was so well behaved, and didn't do any of that nasty stretching or buckling that some jerseys can do when you sew with them. Bliss!

Project Details
Pattern: McCalls 5752
Fabric: 2.4m Liberty Jersey from Tessuti Fabrics

To be honest, though, I did find the pattern to be a bit needlessly fiddly. The mid section, for example, had you gather pieces which were then sewn onto a backing. All well and good, but then they ask you to sew another facing onto the back of that. Needless to say, I didn't both doing that, as it seemed (a) pointlesss and (b) like it would do nothing but add extra bulk to the mid section. Trust me - after having a child, you want to minimise bulk in that area at all costs!

Apart from that it was a fairly simple pattern to make. Although, you could probably make a sack out of Liberty, and it would look awesome!

PS: If you haven't already, don't forget to enter the Liberty jersey giveaway!

Happy Birthday to me... and a Liberty Jersey giveaway!

Today is my 33rd birthday - hoorah! As a way to celebrate the milestone, and also as a way to give a big thank you to all my lovely readers, I'm having a birthday giveaway.

What's this we have over here? Could it be... is it really... well, shake my boots - it's 1.5 metres of Liberty Jersey goodness!



All you need to do to get your hot little hands on the Rolls Royce of fabrics is to leave a comment, and be a follower of my blog. If you're not already a follower then scoot on over and become one. Really, it's too easy! Make sure you leave your name/blog address in the comment so I can find you easily. I'm happy to ship world wide (good grief, this aging business sure is making me generous!) so skedaddle to the comments section and give yourself a fighting chance!

The competition shall remain open until Monday 26th July. Best of luck, and thanks for being the best blog readers in the whole flipping world!

Sneak peek...

...of what I'm pretty sure is going to be my new favourite dress. Liberty jersey - what's not to love?!

Vogue 8511 - The Shorty Short Version

It was a beautiful sunny day, and Jorth was riding her bike to work wearing her new Vogue 8511 when she heard the tell tale siren of a police car behind her, warning somebody to pull over. With a shock, Jorth realised the siren was for her. In a panic, she quickly gave her bike the once over. Lights present and flashing? Check. Helmet on? Check. Reflectors in all the right places? Check. What could possibly be the problem?

As she pulled over and dismounted from her bike, the police slowed down, rolled down their window and said "Nice legs there, short skirt!" and then drove off in a puff of exhaust fumes and macho chuckling.

"Nagdammit!" said a red-faced Jorth, climbing back on the bike in a huff. "I knew I shouldn't have shortened the skirt by 16cm. What the heck was I thinking?"

She then rode off, all too aware of the breeze freely circulating around her nether regions and promising herself this would be the last time she wore such a short skirt whilst riding her bike.***



***I'd just like to clarify that this didn't actually happen. I am well aware that our policemen (and woman) are hardworking people doing what can be at times a ghastly job, and not only do I take my hat off to them but regard them with nothing but respect. I just let my imagination run away from me when writing this post in the hope that blog readers would get a chuckle out of it. Sorry for any confusion caused! It truly is nothing but a piece of fiction. However the sad chopping off of 16cm of fabric? That, alas, is the truth...

Project Details
Pattern: Vogue 8511
Fabric: 1.6m Japanese cotton from Tessuti Fabrics
Notions: 22" zip, hook and eye

Well, as regular readers will know this is the third (oh the shame!) version of this dress I've made. Really, I promise I will stop now. Even though it's so easy to whip up, and is super comfy to wear, and - apart from issues of public decency and self-modesty - is rather easy to ride a bike in.

What can I say? I like to get my money's worth out of a pattern!

Knitting Like Fury

Yikes! I really should have made some annoucement concerning my disappearing act during the school holidays. The truth is, I didn't actually mean to disappear. I had every intention of updating this old blog, but I was just enjoying being with Grumbles so much that I kept thinking "Ach! Blog can wait! I'll do it tomorrow..."

But as James Bond can tell you, tomorrow never comes. Well, not at least until now anyway.

Rest assured, dear readers, that it has not been all lying-on-couch-and-eating-bonbons. In fact, the last two days have been spent knitting like fury. You see, my dear friend had a baby rather unexpectedly (and darn quickly - 3 hours from whoa to go!) four weeks early, and the poor little chap had nothing to wear that would actually fit him, so to rescue came I with an impromptu handknit. Saturday afternoon found me rushing into the city for this:



...and then after knitting for four furious hours on Saturday night (oh yeah baby, we know how to party chez Jorth!) then another four on Sunday morning found me happily wrapping up this:



Ok, so I gave myself sore wrists in the process, but wee little Logan and his warmth needs were worth it. Besides, I can think of no better omen for a happy life than being welcomed into the world with a garment that was made by hands, each stitch done with love, and it was all done just for you.

Project Details
Pattern: Ribbed Baby Jacket by Debbie Bliss, size 0 - 3 months
Yarn: 3 balls of Debbie Bliss Cashmerino Aran
Needles: 4.5mm and 5mm

Note: The pattern calls for 4 balls to make the 0 - 3 size, but I used a scant 3 balls, which kinda ticked me off a bit. So be warned - that extra ball is simply not needed, so save yourself the $13.10!

You are the sunshine of my life

Yesterday, on Grumble's last day of being 5, we walked to school happily chatting about what a big year being 5 has been for her, and all the things that she has achieved.

"I learnt to ride a bike by myself!"
"And a scooter"
"And to swim! And we went on an aeroplane!"
"That's right, Tiger. And do you remember that we went on a train under the water - and even a train on a boat?"
"That's crazy! And we went to Switzerland! And to the zoo!"
"Not sure that I'd put those two in the same category, but yes, we did. And you started school this year."
"And now I can read! And write!"
"You sure can, honey. And you got to meet your English Great-Grandparents..."
"Groff and Gram-Gram! And I was sick on the aeroplane - I remember that!"

And so on we walked, happily reminiscing about all the things that Grumbles had done that year for the very first time. Although, by the end of the walk we were somewhat running out of achievements. I believe the last one she came up with was this:

"And I learnt to lick the cheese sauce out of the saucepan!"

Oh my darling girl. Don't ever change! I am as proud as punch to be your mum, and to be lucky enough to experience the untrammelled delight that every moment with you brings.

And thank you, God, for allowing me to stick around to watch my little girl grow up. I'm so glad that I was able to wrestle with death that day, and win. I wouldn't have missed being with Grumbles for the world.

Happy 6th birthday, my love.

How to win friends and influence people

When getting together with new friends for a coffee for the first time, one should follow these steps in order to guarantee a successful meeting.

1 - Be on time. People appreciate your punctuality. Unlike Jorth, who left the house with a scant 5 minutes to spare, and then practically had to run the 2kms to the cafe, whereupon arriving she spent the next 10 minutes apologising for how late she was, and how puffed out, and maybe a glass of water gulp gulp gulp more water gulp gulp gee whiz I'm puffed and hot are you hot gulp gulp gulp ok so maybe it's just me gulp gulp.

2 - Listen carefully to your companion, and ask questions with thoughtful details that show you have been paying attention. You lived in London, you say? Geez, I love London...heavens my nose is running... heehee maybe because I ran all the way here...now, I think I have a tissue somewhere hooooooonkhoooooonkhooooonk so London, do tell me more hooooooonk hoooooooonk oh my nose, I'm streaming! Yes, London's great, isn't it hoooooooooooooooonk sniffle sniffle honk.

3 - Hold up your end of the conversation, but beware of monopolising it. Yes, so after I stopped working as a technical writer I choke choke choke oh my sainted aunt my tea has totally gone down the wrong way choke choke choke yes I know I should stop talking but choke choke geez I can't even breath choke choke cough hack choke now I'm crying for Pete's sake choke choke anyway tech choke writing choke choke ok, hang on just choke give me a minute and perhaps some water choke chokity choke oh sh*t I drank all my bloody water choke hack choke gulp gulp gulp.................[stupefied silence from both parties, with the occasional gasp for breath by Jorth]

So, simply follow these three easy steps and you'll be on your way to winning new friends in no time. Best of luck!

Damn that looks tasty!

Is it wrong to eat muesli for lunch? Because looking at this shot - which I took on the weekend for the Big Harvest cafe - is making me want to just dive on in to that compotey, yoghurty goodness. Yum!
If anybody wants me, I'll be here, licking my monitor. Because, alas, my cupboard is bare, and try as I might I can't find any yoghurt in my fridge. Damn. Must. Go. Food. Shopping. ASAP.

The Ruffle Backed Pinafore

Project Details
Pattern: Pinafore from Ottobre Magazine 1/2007
Fabric: Ryder Denim from Tessuti Fabrics
Notions: 2 recycled buttons from stash

Such a cute and easy pinafore to whip up. The hardest part was doing the rolled edges on the ruffles (fact for the future: denim fabric does not like being rolled) but we got there in the end. You could just edge them with overlocking, or even do a wee little hem, but you wouldn't get that true ruffle look that you get with the rolled edge, so it was worth the swearing effort.

Handy little pattern, too. Winter versions could be done in denim, as above, or corduroy, and for summer they would look smashing done in printed cottons, chambrays or linens. Me likes, and Grumbles likes, which is the main thing. All in all I give it a big thumbs up!

The disgrunted dummy

Sabrina the ancient dressmaker's dummy gave a deep, disguntled sigh. As was the case for the past few days, the rest of the furniture ignored her. They were well aware of her sewing-based divatude, and had long ago decided the best policy was to ignore her completely.

But Sabrina would not be ignored. She gave another sigh, and then - with a fury that needed to be seen to be believed - burst forth with "Oh, I DO wish that Jorth would hurry up and finish this latest Vogue 8511. She's done the bodice, and put it on me in a rather nice fashion, but then what has she done with the skirt? Nothing, that's what, whilst she dithers about deciding what length to make it. Meanwhile I'm standing here, with nothing but a pinned on skirt front to protect my modesty! Let me tell you, fellow furniture, with this chilly weather we are having an older lady like myself could do with a bit more covering! Is a skirt back too much to ask? Hmmmmm?"

One little piano stool couldn't resist, and piped up "Oh, but dearest, we never hear you complain of the cold when you are naked!"

Sabrina glared at the insolent bench. "None of your cheek, young thing. Let me remind you that your comfy cushion will be flattened before you know it by hours of piano practice. I don't expect we'll be hearing any of your lofty opinions then. And speaking of, I thought Jorth had made a sewing pledge to get this dress finished. It appear to have gone the way of her blogging pledge. Oh she's a flighty one, she is. Gone and bought some Liberty jersey, and all thoughts of me and my needs have flown out the window."

Completely unaware of the conversation taking place, Jorth was getting out her overlocker, having decided that she would make the skirt on the shorter side. If she did hear any sighs from Sabrina she put it down to the wind that was rattling the window panes, and happily got out her scissors, unpinned the skirt front from the dummy (Oh! Sabrina gasped. The cold, cold drafts!) and got to work.

The sewing pledge

I, Jorth, do hereby solemnly swear on the sacred trinity of needle, thread and fabric, that I shall block out a nice big chunk of time to do some sewing today. I shall rush about at breakneck speed like a mad woman this morning, doing my errands, and then shall come home and sew like I've never sewn before.

I won't even stop, whilst out and about, to do The Age quiz with Max, the cantankerous book shop owner, despite it being our regular ritual. And let me tell you, I love beating him in the quiz, but such is my commitment to sewing that I shall make the sacrifice, even though it pains me.
It really is a pity about the quiz, as I can feel in my boots that it is my lucky day, but goshdarnit, the projects and stash are out of control. Sewing must, and will, be done!

Craft paralysis

I don't know what it is at the moment, but I just can't seem to settle down to any sort of craft activity. I have both a dress cut out and ready to sew, plus the above jumper I am knitting, but have completely lost interest in both.

This problem is compounded by the fact that we are now in the depths of winter. When the night falls as quickly as it does, all I want to do is crawl into bed with a good book. Some nights actually find me in bed, devouring my favourite Nancy Mitford a mere 15 minutes after Grumbles has been put down, and she goes to bed at 7:30!

Also, I feel like I'm doing a lot of rushing around the moment, and I'm just not getting any decent chunks of time in which to craft in. Oftentimes I'll find myself with half an hour before I need to go and pick up Grumbles from school. It doesn't seem worth the hassle to bring out and set up the sewing machine, and the thought of knitting is making me go bleugh (which does not bode well for any winter garments I hope to whip up!), so I instead find myself on The Guardian reading George Monbiot's latest missive. What George rails against is both fascinating and educational, but it's not helping me in the craft department.

This weekend, however, is a long one, so I'm determined to hunt down and utilise my crafting mojo. So watch this space - I may even produce a miracle and have a finished object to show you!

Organisation is the key!

It hasn't taken me long to figure out that the difference between a happy working Jorth and a nasty, grumpy, mean-tempered working Jorth is having a good supply of dinners tucked away into the freezer. Because, honestly, nothing will put me in a fouler mood than spending all day on my feet, and then having to come home and cook - particularly when it's wet and dark, and poor old Grumbles and I have had a 20 minute walk home in the freezing winter gloom.

And if I have to do dishes before I cook, then watch out - I am definitely not pleasant to be around (yes, it's a fault, I'm working on it!) So what I do now is to make double batches of any soups/lasagnes/casseroles that I'm making and have then waiting on standby for nights when I've worked.

It's heaven! All I have to do is pop whatever it is in the oven, and then whilst we wait Grumbles and I cuddle on the couch, catch up on each other's days, and if we are feeling particuarly industrious we even do her reader. And peace and harmony reigns once more.

Although, if all else fails, there is always omlettes...

Another one in the works

Jorth sat back in her chair and took the chewed up greylead pencil out of her mouth with a sigh. In front of her lay a sheet of paper headed Reasons For And Against Making Another Vogue 8511.

In the For column she had written the following:
 - It's the perfect dress for work! Comfy to wear, yet so smart looking. A guaranteed compliment getter!

 - So easy to ride my bike in (see above)

 - Easy to wash, easy to wear

 - It was a remnant piece of the perfect length. That's got to be an 8511 omen!

 - Perfect for autumn, winter and spring. Definitely will get loads of wear.

The Against column was looking a little more skimpy:

 - If I make it too short then I might be flashing some unwittingly exposing my underwear to poor motorists as I ride my bike.

 - This will be my third... it's almost as bad as Vogue 8184. What will people think?

Jorth, brow furrowed and lips pursed, suddenly snatched up the paper and crumpled it, muttering to herself "Damn what people think! It's a great dress, and I'm going to make myself another!" With that she turned to the kitchen table, and with brow suddenly unfurrowing and a smile playing upon her lips, began to cut another one out.