Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Weather-based knitting insults

Geranium Knitting

"Well!" said the leader of the knitting circle with a flourish of her head of tightly permed grey hair. "Another winter has come to an end, so it's time to pack away your needles, and we'll see you ladies again once the dreaded summer has passed."

"Really?", said Jorth in surprise. "But I'm just getting my knit on! Yes, I know I didn't have a great winter, what with waiting forever for balls of yarn to arrive, or just generally being a slo-mo, but I've hit my knitting stride. Do we really have to finish up for the year?"

The leader gave her a beady eyed look and said in a voice that she usually reserved for her 46 year old still living at home son, "It's summer now, Miss Jorth. Who on earth wants to be knitting in the heat?"

The rest of the knitting group looked on with no little anticipation. It was better than a tennis match, watching the verbal volleys going on between Jorth and the leader. Sensing that the ball was in her court, Jorth said "Well, obviously I don't want to knit with cotton. Boy, does that make my wrists hurt! But there's plenty of other lovely fibres out there, and with the extra daylight hours I'm sure I'll have all those cardigans I've planned for the Tyger knitted up in no time."

The assembled ladies sighed. As far as they were concerned, Jorth had hit the ball straight out of the court. The leader gathered up her knitting bag and said "May I be so bold to ask, Miss Jorth, what prevents you from knitting so much in the winter, when the conditions are far more favourable? Truly, I'm simply dying to know."

Jorth looked somewhat embarrassed at this scornful question. She fidgeted for a brief moment before answering, "Oh, well, when the sun goes to bed so do I."

"That would indeed explain it!" said the leader snootily. "So once again I shall bid farewell to those of us who can actually sit up in the winter nights to knit, and I'm sure that we all wish you the best with your summer knitting, and pray that your sweaty fingers do not sully your yarn too much." Smiling at her victory shot she sailed out of the room, leaving Jorth feeling rather small behind her.

"Don't worry about her too much" said a small women with a dowager's hump but a twinkle in her eye that Jorth hadn't really noticed much before. Leaning in conspiratorially she said "Sometimes when she carries on like that I imagine myself sticking a knitting needle in her eye, and it makes me feel ever so much better!"

"Ta!" said Jorth, suddenly grinning. "Although, I probably should be a bit more regular in my knitting. Perhaps an hour every day, after dinner, sun or no sun. Otherwise I'll never get through my planned project backlog."

Her new friend smiled. "The long list of projects is, to my mind, more a sign of a true knitter than the weather. But perhaps", patting her gently on the arm, "a little bit more regularity wouldn't go astray."

Please tell me I'm not the only one who knits away in summer (yes, maybe with the odd sweaty hands). Does anybody else have any summer knits planned?


  1. Does it count when you procrastinate over knitting a winter school scarf so long that it takes you all through one winter and you realise that at the rate you are progressing you are going to have to 'summer knit' to get it finished in time for NEXT winter. And its just a simple boring single coloured scarf, nothing fancy.....maybe that's the problem.

  2. Heehee!I thnk my very first scarf went the same way!

  3. If I don't knit through summer I'm not going to have anything finished for winter! :)

  4. I can't knit further than a scarf, alas, but I do crochet in any kind of weather! She sounds like a rather rude lady, Jorth :( hope you feel better.

  5. I knit 365 days of the year regardless of the weather, regardless of the pattern and yarn. I'd be in the naughty corner, no doubt.

  6. You're definitely not the only one who knits through summer.

    When it gets warmer I generally work on lighter things, like lace, or use cotton/silk/linen/bamboo.

    That said, I have been known to work on heavy winter jumpers at the height of summer...

  7. Yes I knit in summer because knitting does not need the iron and turning on the iron right now is very unappealing.

  8. Knit on my dear! I laughed out loud at your post - why are some older women so rigid.

  9. ms jorth, i am such a slow knitter if i didnt knit all year round NOTHING would ever get finished!. i just cant work out whether i knit at a slow pace or not regularly enough...or there is always the thought that we do lots of other stuff as well....knit away i say....

  10. Well actually I have my summer knitting sitting :) cause it is Winter for us now. I want to move onto gloves, mittens and hats for Christmas gifts but my poor neglected summer weight (bamboo and silk) sweater sit in a bag calling out to me.

    I cannot wait for summer to come back and I can sit poolside with my knitting in hand.


  11. I love knitting socks in summer. I remember a few years ago when it was a 40+ degree day sitting under my air conditioner knitting a scarf. It's always knitting season!

  12. Now what would the knit circle leader say to me? "Now Butterfly why is it you knit ONLY in summer?" Should I tell her that I run out of knitting projects for the year by June? Or that my sewing machine has much better lighting? Oh how about: Sweaty hands preshrink my yarn! I could go on for ever and ever. I would make up one explanation after the other. All of them would surely give her a heart attack. But wouldn't her being rude to you justify that?

  13. Oh knit on! I'm not in Aussieland at the moment. I'm pretending to be a Londoner so it's the perfect time for knitting for me as the days get cooler and cooler. I find winter much more inspiring but since I love to knit I do it all year round. When I want. I do agree with that violent knitter (tee hee), a backed up list of projects is a sign of a real knitter. So too, I think, is having multiple projects on the go. :)

  14. Anonymous2:26 pm

    You cannot prise the knitting out of my hands, no matter what the season ... except when it's over 36 degrees, say.

    I've just cast on a pair of socks, and I'm swatching for a cardie.

  15. Anonymous12:46 am

    We are moving into winter her in the UK - but I would knit any darn time. Carry on that girl!

  16. I didn't know it's a winter activity?! So glad 'bad' habbits die hard! Here in South Africa we are frying out little by little and knitting keeps my physical activity limited to the minimum, selfpreservation 101! Love your blog!


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