Wednesday, March 28, 2012

The 2012 Crafting Olympics Part 3


It was, thought Bob, a bit like watching a horse race, albeit one involving balls of yarn and Jorth rather than actual horses. But still, the Grand National had nothing on this. They can keep their silly fences, their steeples, their ditches. This race had Jorth facing obstacles such as pressing demands on her time, invitations out and her own tiredness, all of which were contriving to knock her off her steed (otherwise known as her position on the couch where she sat to knit each evening) and prevent her from finishing the race (or, in knitting parlance, get that darn dress finished already, would ya?). This, thought Bob with relish, was a race worth watching!

As Jorth assumed her position on the couch, and began to knit away, Bob and Jean-Luc began to watch her speculatively as they resumed their running commentary.

"Well, she's started off with a nice pace this evening. She's handling those increases with remarkable ease."

"Let's hope she doesn't just do a few increases, and then call it a night. It's a long race, and she won't win it like that!", smirked Jean-Luc.

But Jorth began to surprise them. Despite myriad yawns, and frequent rubbing of eyes, she ploughed on until the clock struck 10. Finishing her row, she shook out her knitting and then leaned over to intently read her pattern instructions, before glancing with a furrowed brow at the garment taking shape.

"Aha!" crowed Jean-Luc. "I knew this would happen! She has left the knitting all alone and neglected for these past few weeks, and then she picks it up and knits away without checking her pattern properly. Lo! I bet she has made a mistake! Silly girl", and with a sly look at Bob he added "I am so glad I have not tipped her to win. That would have been embarrassing indeed!"

Bob clutched at his microphone with white knuckles. He refused to believe that she could stumble so early on in the race. But Jean-Luc's words had stung him a little. She wasn't knitting as hard nor as frequently as he had hoped she would. Surely, surely, she would finish the dress before winter and not let Bob down.

Suddenly Bob let out a whoop of joy. Jean-Luc, who had been admiring himself  and twirling his moustache in the reflection of the microphone stand started in confusion. "What is it?" he demanded to know. "Has she dropped a stitch? Did she miss an increase? Tell me, you fat fool, what the devil is going on?"

"That is what's going on!" replied Bob happily as he pointed to Jorth who was currently brandishing a tape measure. Leaning in close to the mic, he said "This is a wonderful piece of news for all of our listeners at home - Jorth has just measured her knitted piece, and I'm very please to say that she is now up to the armhole decreases. Yes, it's glad tidings, wouldn't you agree, Jean-Luc?"

"Pah!" said Jean-Luc with no little disdain. "She has a very long way to go if she is only up to her first set of armhole decreases."

"But that's the thing, old chap!" said Bob as he bounced about in his seat. "She's up to the armhole decreases on her second piece. This is the front - she's already completed the back!" Leaning in once more to the mic, he boomed "Go Jorthy!", causing Jean-Luc to remove his cans with a wince and mutter to himself "I must do something to stop this. This absurd amount of knitting has gone on long enough! It is time for me to become... crafty."
The 2012 Crafting Olympics Part 1
The 2012 Crafting Olympics Part 2


  1. Moiaussii8:16 pm

    The crafting Olympics posts are making me absurdly happy! Go Jorthy indeed ;)

  2. I can't WAIT to see this dress finished.x

  3. Oh my stars! That Jean-Luc is definitely one to watch carefully. I do hope that Bob will let Jorth know to be hyper-aware for an increased number of inviations out or a sudden onset of extra sleepiness. 'Check your tea before you drink Jorth, check your tea!'

  4. You go girl, I cant wait to see this dress.


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