Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Picking Up

Picking Up Stitches

Jorth and the orange cardigan faced each other in a knitting Mexican stand off.

"You can't make me do it!" said Jorth shrilly. "I've had enough, I really have!"

"C'mon", wheedled the cardigan. "Just one more button band to do, and you're done. I'll be out of your hair forever, you'll never need think of me again."

"Don't you talk to me of button bands", retorted Jorth. "I think I've sustained permanent nerve damage in the pads of my fingers from trying to pick up those 140-odd stitches yesterday with those tiny 2.5mm needles."

"It's hardly my fault you are so maladroit that you stab yourself in the finger with the needles all the time", said the cardigan crossly. "Look, just finish me up, and we'll quit each other for good."

"Finish?" asked Jorth incredulously. "I've still got the seaming to do, you rascally orange brute!"

"Be like that then", said the cardigan offhandedly. "Shove me in a bag in the cupboard if you like. But you know as well as I do I"ll always be there, tugging away at your conscience like a pesky knitted ghost. Just think of the wailing I'll do every time you even contemplate beginning a new project..."

Jorth was silent, digesting this scenario with no little trepidation. The cardigan seized her chance.

"What a pity it would be to deny the Tyger the pleasure of wearing me. That sweet kid loves nothing more than a hand knit made especially for her by her adoring mother. Oh well, if you see fit to keep me away..."

"Arrrrgggh!" said Jorth. "Emotional manipulation!"

"Whatever works, lady. I'll play dirty if I have to. Now square with me - do we have a deal or not?"

Jorth sighed. "Fine. It's a deal. I finish you up right now, and you'll never bug me about knitting you up again."

The cardigan grinned. "I shall never bug you about knitting me up again. Hand washing me, however, with the finest wool wash known to man, is another matter - bwahahahahahah!"

It says something about how great Jorth's desire was to be done with working on this knit that she refrained from squashing it into a bag and bundling into the cupboard then and there. Trying to quash the thought of how satisfying it would have been to have slammed, really slammed the cupboard door shut on it, she picked up her needles and began to work.


  1. I have far too many projects screaming out at me from behind closet doors, unfortunately, I have become most used to the sound of their drones and please. Maybe I should be more of a humanitarian and help them out to reach their full potentials...thanks for the inspiration!

  2. And it is not like stretching out or stabbing it with pointy sticks would have made it shut up.

  3. Too, too funny - I actually laughed out loud. Your poor fingers, I know exactly how you feel!


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