Jorth walked home, feeling the bittersweet tugging of her heart over the first day back at school. For the last 6 weeks she had been shadowed by a very talkative companion, who was now happily sitting cross-legged in her new classroom, staring enamoured at her teacher whilst Jorth let herself into the house alone.
The silence was heavy, despite the cheerful working music being played, as the dishes were done, the beds were made, the floor swept. Once the daily jobs were finished Jorth thought about sitting on the couch and feeling a wee bit lonely and sorry for herself, just for a quiet minute or two, but shook her head determinedly and set about composing the shopping list. Rolls for burgers, yoghurt, milk, salad leaves were written down. She did not write "Man I miss her chatter", even though she did.
Shopping done, Jorth returned home, and checked the mailbox herself. It was a much quieter procedure, doing it herself, and Jorth missed the clamour of the box being opened, exclamations over the presence of mail, and the mail box door being slammed shut. "Get a grip, Jorth!" she muttered. "She's happy, healthy and having a great time. She's growing up, and that is how it's meant to be. Now find something to do, and get over this mopeyness!"
Later that afternoon, after a very dull and quiet lunch, she sat and picked up her sewing. Pinning some pieces together, she pricked her finger with a blunt pin. "Dammit!" said Jorth, as a drop of blood oozed out, and the tears welled in her eyes. Putting the sewing down on the table and sucking on her finger, Jorth let the tears fall unbidden.
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The strange thing is I actually feel much more cheerful after writing that. Talk about blog therapy! Here's hoping that all my readers who have little ones back at school have a good first day (mums, dads and kids) and a great year ahead.
This is how I have been feeling almost all week. My yougest started school on Tuesday. I have been fighting the tears and I have been avoiding my blog. Maybe I need to sit down and write about how I feel. Blog therapy is awesome!
ReplyDeleteAww
ReplyDeleteWhile you know that it is a good and necessary thing, it doesn't stop a mother's heart breaking just a little bit every time her child's independence outside the home grows. Glad that you are feeling better.
ReplyDeleteWell I was coping until I read your post- now I'm in tears! My twins started yr 1 on Monday... it is so q-u-i-e-t around here, I miss the madness!!
ReplyDeleteLove your blog by the way - awesome sewing projects and brilliant writing :-)
Although I am 2 years away from my lil one starting kinder, hearing about other parent's return to school blues, has reinforced reality. The time I have with Gwen is passing by so quickly.
ReplyDeleteAdults and children live in completely different time zones. The passage of time for a child is rather slow, yet the opposite for adults.
I know just how you feel. Our Maya has just started prep and the house is very empty without her and her brothers. I even miss putting on playschool
ReplyDeleteMy youngest has just enrolled at uni....that same heavy mopeyness sits in my tummy....it doesnt get any easier, every step they take, tug hard on the heart stings...we mothers dont learn!
ReplyDeleteI really feel for you. I can relate to this so much.
ReplyDeleteOur children are so lucky, though, that, being the way we are, we're not parents who palm them off on others whenever we get the chance...arrange sleepovers and holiday clubs etc etc just to get them out of our hair, and not because they want to go (although sleepover will be a bad word in this house for many years to come!)
It's natural for us to miss these little people, but we are balanced enough to take the view that, much as we miss them, it's so necessary to develop their confidence in being a little more independent as the years go by.
However, if I had my way I'd chain my little man to the house and never let him go!
Weathergirl went back last week, yet I haven't had a chance to be in an empty house without her but next week I have three homedays whilst school is on and frankly I'm a bit scared :(
ReplyDelete*sniffle*
ReplyDeleteAs each day of the term passes I'm sure it'll get easier. :-)
ah yes, i am well acquainted with this particular woe. (this week we had four ice days all in a row, so i got to have the littles home with me almost the entire week! i am secretly cooking up ways to keep them always.)
ReplyDeleteSad isn't it. But she will move on to bigger adventure. My baby is leaving home next week to study in Melbourne. Sniffle yes, a definite two hanky job. she is letting me catch the plane with her, but only because it doubles the luggage allowance!
ReplyDeleteHave you ever considered publishing an e-book or guest authoring on other websites?
ReplyDeleteI have a blog centered on the same ideas you discuss and would really like to have you share some stories/information.
I know my audience would enjoy your work. If
you are even remotely interested, feel free to send me an e-mail.
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